SUS Super Frat Movie Page of Death
The frat movie, enjoyed by all but respected only by the few clear
headed movie connoisseurs that proudly scour the $1 a week sections of their
local video store. Those who dare to
challenge themselves mentally and emotionally are constantly rewarded by such
classics as the Revenge of the Nerds series (of which the novel is in Oprah’s
book club), or Party Camp. These movies
contain subtle subconscious messages caused by the imagery and creativity of
these finely created pieces of work.
Most cannot possibly comprehend the severity in which these movies deal
with reality and modern day issues in the complicated plotlines that tell these
tales. The plotlines not only cause an
emotional self exploration through clever manipulation of issues related to the
youth of the world, but can be uplifting and challenging to today’s youth.
What is a frat moive?
The term frat movie covers the vast genre of comedy movies, generally made in the 1980’s, which stars mostly teenagers. However these movies must also comply with most (if not all) of the following guidelines:
§ It must be set
either at school or college, at a beach, or at a camp.
§ Someone (if not
everyone) has to be trying to ‘get laid’.
§ There has to be
nerds (good guys) and jocks (bad guys)of some description.
§ There must be
wacky hijinx or zany pranks.
§ The front cover
of the video must have a scantily clad female and often in cartoon form.
§ At the end of the
movie some sporting event wins back the school, camp, beach, girl, university
degree.
§ Finally and most
importantly, blatant, pointless and repeated tit shots.
How do I know if a video is a good frat movie just from the cover?
The steps above are a good start but here are a few more helpful hints:
§ A good frat movie
is generally a bad regular movie so pick something that looks crappy.
§ Pick anything
with the words Camp, Beach, Summer, Fraternity, Party, Nerds, Jocks and College
in the title. eg Fraternity Vacation or
Attack of the Party Nerds
§ In the warning
for the movie rating look for sex, nudity and coarse language.
§ Look for words
such as wacky, zany, mayhem etc in the description.
§ Know what era you
are after. Late 80’s and early 80’s
movies are different.
§ If in doubt just
grab one.
What makes a classic frat movie?
§ A panty raid.
§ Sneaking into,
looking through a hole in the wall into, or videotaping the girls showers.
§ A minority group
character ie a fat guy ,a gay guy or a foreign exchange student.
§ Someone yelling out,
“PARTY!!!!!!!!”, or ‘NERDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!’
§ A good showing of
80’s music, clothes, hair, sayings, and way of life.
§ Really, really,
extremely pointless tit shots for no real reason whatsoever.
§ Pranks that end
up with someone in their underwear.
Frat Movie Directory
Name: Firehouse
Rating: M
Year: 1987
Starring: Barrett Hopkins,
Shannon Murphy, Violet Brown and John Anderson
Running Time: 91 minutes
Hilarities ensue when three chicks join the fire department. All the guys want to get laid. They all have to save the city.
Highlights: Extinguisher
The
comedian at the nudy bar
Constant
visits to the nudy bar
Frat Rating: 7
Regular Movie Rating: 4
Name: Fraternity Vacation
Rating: M
Year: 1985
Starring: Stephen Geoffries, Sheree J Wilson, Cameron
Dye, Tim Robbins, Leigh McCloskey, Matt McCoy, John Vernon
Running Time: 89 minutes
Hilarities ensue when Joe and Tucker have to look after Wendell the
college geek. All the guys want to get
laid (and they make a $1000 bet about it).
They have to save the nerd from being a nerd.
Highlights: Celebrities
such as Tim Robbins (and his sly manoeuvres)
and Marcy Darcy
from Married With Children
and the chick
from Renegade
Telescopic Camera
into the chicks apartments
Frat Rating: 7
Regular Movie Rating: 5
Name: Jocks
Rating: M
Year: Unknown
Starring: Scott Strade, Christopher Lee, Richard
Roundtree, R G Armstrong, Perry Lang
Running Time: 90 minutes
Hilarities ensue when the college tennis team compete in the national
finals. All the guys want to get
laid. They have to save the tennis team
from being cut from the budget.
Highlights: Ogre
from revenge of the nerds
Wacky Tennis mayhems
Frat Rating: 6
Regular Movie Rating: 3
Name: Paradise Motel
Rating: M
Year: Unknown
Starring: Gary Hershberger, Robert Kranz, Jonna Leigh
Stack, Bob Basso
Running Time: 87 minutes
Hilarities ensue when the new guy at school rents out a room in his Dad’s
motel so they can pull rooties. All the
guys get laid except him. They have to
save the main girl from her cheating boyfriend.
Highlights: The guys dad
Frat Rating: 5
Regular Movie Rating: 3
Name: Spring
Break
Rating: M
Year: 1983
Starring: Daivd Knell, Perry Lang, Steve Bassett,
Jayne Modean, Corinne Alphen
Running Time: 100 minutes
Hilarities ensue when two college students have their hotel room double
booked with two party animal jocks. All
the guys want to get laid while their roommates actually get laid. They have to save the hotel from being closed
down.
Highlights: The Coke machine incident
Eesh
The wet T-shirt competition
Frat Rating: 8
Regular Movie Rating: 6
Name: Summer
Job
Rating: M
Year: Unknown
Starring: James Summer, Carl Mayor, Renee Shugart,
Fred Bourdin
Running Time: 88 minutes
Hilarities ensue when the wacky summer hotel employees come in for
summer vacation work. All the guys and
chicks want to get laid. They have to
save the boss from banning the big end of summer party.
Highlights: The geeky guy
Blatant tit shots
The big fat chick that’s
after that pervert guy
Frat Rating: 8